Cereal Killers: The Incredible Crock of Things You Don’t Need

This weekend, I treated myself to a box of cereal. (I am a hardcore cereal lover. I would eat cereal for almost every meal if I could, but that would be unhealthy and expensive. Instead, it’s a once-in-a-while treat.) As I crunched away on my flakes, I studied the back of the box, and found one of the most ridiculous examples of “you don’t need it, but we’ll sell it to you anyway” that I’ve seen in quite some time.

The Special K Challenge, as I remember it (from my days of regular cereal consumption) went a little something like this: replace 2 meals a day with 1 serving of Special K each plus milk and fruit, and lose weight. While that original philosophy certainly pushed their cereal, it appeared to be based pretty firmly in reality – at 160 calories, a bowl of Special K is certainly less than what most people eat for a meal. Burn more calories than you consume, and poof! The weight falls off like magic. (Well, arithmetic.)

The new Challenge is a bit more…complicated. Replace one meal with cereal or one Special K Eggo waffle, plus fruit and milk. Replace the second meal with a Special K Protein Bar or cereal, fruit, and milk. Don’t forget your snacks – “choose from Cereal Bars, Snack Bites, Protein Snack Bars and Protein Waters”. I’m sure that as long as you consume those snacks in moderation, you may still reduce your caloric intake…but I’m curious about the logic here: a year ago, two bowls of cereal were sufficient, but now it’s cereal and a bar or some special calorie-laden water? Yeah, no thanks.

From a diet standpoint, this is pretty obviously bad – they’ve added extra calories, which moves you farther from — not closer to — your weight loss goal…but that’s not really my bag. What tweaks my knob is how easily they slide that extra consumption in there.

Folks, make sure that you know not only what you’re buying, but why you’re buying it. You might find that you can do without, and save yourself some money in the process.

*Disclaimer: I know nothing about diets (as my size 18 ass will testify), and my recollection of the old-school Challenge is based purely on hazy memories of early-morning cereal binges. YMMV.